So hard, Melissa - I get it. It's a middle-of-the-road path that tends to sway one way or the other depending on the "request"...and I am with you: they just won't fully ever get it, until they have their own! There's just nothing like having another being's entire safety in your hands - and so not wanting to mess them up! So we do the best we can and even so means - they will not like us many of those times! 😟...hard!