Good for you -- I am so happy for you that you have found your approach.

I have a childhood friend --so this goes back over 30 years -- and it astounds me, but every Christmas she imposes herself on other family members and used to be us...I never understood her "escape" --

I understand that there may be some stuff she is dealing with but it's her abrupt way of just assuming any and all should welcome them during holidays. I wish she would just go to random places and just be --

Deb - the good thing is you communicate. She doesn't - I feel she's completely obscure and incredibly fake.

I get that your husband misses you or would rather you partake in his "holidaying" style - but after you sacrificed yourself for sooooo many years, this is healthy for you.

Kudos to both of you on working it out...😘